


And All This is but a Mother's Burden

by slamncram (GettheSalt)



Series: Trettien [5]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Fictober, Gen, M/M, Minor Character Death, POV Outsider, Parent-Child Relationship, Pre-Thor (2011), Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-05
Updated: 2018-10-05
Packaged: 2019-07-25 15:54:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16200758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GettheSalt/pseuds/slamncram
Summary: When Odin had brought the babe to her, she'd shared his vision. A ward, raised alongside their own son, one day to be married to him and unite their kingdoms. When they had brought the babe to Thor, and he'd asked if this was his brother, everything changed.Seeing her sons' suffering now, Frigga wishes she hadn't spared him the tears then, she she could spare them tears now.





	And All This is but a Mother's Burden

**Author's Note:**

> Fictober Day 5/31. More film canon angst, and outside look at Thor and Loki's relationship before Thor's coronation.

When Odin had brought Loki to Frigga’s chambers, tiny and sound asleep, he hadn’t intended for things to go the way they had. Loki had been wrapped up in blankets to keep him warm, and once she’d uncovered his face, Frigga’s first question had been why he didn’t _look_ Jotunn. Odin’s answer had carried a level of self-importance that, as Loki grew, Frigga had come to realize was unwarranted. Loki’s power had been strong, even then, and though Odin had downplayed it, saying the babe’s pink complexion had been his doing for the most part, they’d both always known.

Loki’s Asgardian appearance had been the seidr in his responding to his need for care and love. And that, Frigga knew, the moment he blinked open his expressive green eyes, was what she would give him.

Even as their ward. That had been Odin’s plan. Loki would be raised as their ward, the son of a conquered enemy, given a second chance and all the riches and access of a Prince of Asgard could be afforded—to a point. They would raise Loki in their court, care for him, give him the education and training he needed and, when he and Thor were old enough, they would unite Asgard and Jotunheim through the two of them, in marriage.

It had been a good plan, a sound plan, and though Laufey had clearly seen no use in this son, small as he was, Odin and Frigga could both feel the magic within him that simply yearned to be seen, felt, and nurtured. It would be a good match.

Or, it would’ve, had everything not fallen apart the moment Thor laid eyes on him.

“Is this a brother? Do I have a brother?”

The excitement and hope in Thor’s voice is a sound that Frigga remembers well, even now, centuries later. His blue eyes had looked at Loki with wonder, and then at her with pleading. Loki had been introduced to no one else, yet. Odin had brought him home on the Bifrost, snuggled close to his heart under his cloak, and none save Heimdall had known. Even the men who had fought with him in Jotunheim hadn’t known what had become of the babe—their belief was that they’d simply left him. Perhaps he’d already been dead when their king had found him in the temple.

Introducing him to Thor had been Frigga’s idea, but she couldn’t have accounted for this.

Thor knew of siblings. His nannies and caretakers all had children of their own, and Thor would oft play with them, and they would speak of their siblings, brothers and sisters. He’d been beginning to understand that _he_ didn’t have one of those, and that he actually quite wanted one.

If Odin had been paying attention, he might have noticed that sooner. He may have thought this through.

Because the moment Thor laid eyes on Loki, he thought he was being given a brother, and Frigga was not about to break her son’s heart. They could find another match for Thor. They had centuries in which to do it. So, with confidence and a smile, Frigga had answered _yes_. Yes this was Thor’s brother, his name was Loki.

She was the Queen. She could make that decision, and if Odin had ever truly begrudged it, he had never once said.

They’d raised the boys that way. Brothers, both sons of Odin, both sons of Frigga. Heirs to the throne of Asgard.

And Thor and Loki had loved each other. Dearly. They had grown up the fastest of friends, both each other’s dearest companion, and, even when their play could get a little rough - something Odin, in their private moments, could muse was due to Loki’s true parentage – they were never cross with each other for long, never counted each other as enemies. Even when they could become envious of each other, Loki, as the younger brother, far more often than Thor, they were still close.

It had been a good decision, Frigga thought, to tell Thor that Loki was his brother.

But, as the boys had gotten older, she had begun to wonder if her split-second decision to save her son heartbreak and tears had really, truly been worth it.

The boys didn’t know. They couldn’t have known, or understood, or even found out, that Loki was not Asgardian. The few times Frigga had been worried over it, she’d asked Heimdall to assuage her fears that her sons knew their lie, and he’d assured her that they hadn’t figured it out.

Silent in his assurances had been his acknowledgement that he, too, knew why she felt the need to ask.

Thor had grown into a strong, competent young warrior, and Loki had done the same, but while his magic was in his abilities, the ones even Frigga could no longer teach him to grow, Thor’s was on the battlefield, with the legions of Asgard. They perfectly complimented each other.

They would have been a good match.

Perhaps it was Fate laughing at her and Odin for changing their plans to spare a child some tears. Perhaps it was the Norns punishing them for taking the wrong course, by making it so all they could do was see their sons suffering, and have no way to relieve it without revealing their centuries of lies and misdirection.

Frigga never asked Odin if he noticed. Much of the time, she suspected he didn’t. He hadn’t always been the most observant, the All-Father, especially when these things were so close to his hearth.

But Frigga noticed.

She saw the way Thor would look at Loki, the way Loki would touch Thor. She would catch them, sat close together in front of fires, wrapped up in robes and blankets, and would have to pretend she hadn’t noticed how close they were and how low they’d been talking when they jumped apart and addressed her as though they were innocent. She had seen them sneaking away from feasts, balls, and even sparring sessions on the training grounds that Thor was supposed to be overseeing, in preparation for taking the throne.

Her sons were in love, with each other, and the burden of that was evident.

They thought themselves sick, they thought themselves wrong. Frigga knew she shouldn’t have spied on them, but she had needed to know, and knowing made her heart hurt. Enough that on the eve of Thor’s coronation, she finally spoke to Odin about his misgivings over what they had told the boys, and the entire kingdom, about the truth of Loki’s birth.

He had agreed. It was time. They hadn’t had much success in finding a match for Thor, and they were getting older. The truth would come to light one day, and perhaps it would be best, when Thor was on the throne.

Frigga didn’t tell him her main reason for wanting the truth to come out. Though marrying Loki to Thor had been his original intention, she didn’t know how he would take to discovering that the boys they had raised as brothers had fallen into bed with each other and, more than that, had fallen in love. From her perspective, at any rate.

They had agreed.

After Thor’s coronation, after the feasting, they would take the boys aside, and tell them the truth, one at a time, giving special care and attention to Loki.

It would be a shock but, Frigga hoped, knowing the truth would be a burden off of all of them. She and Odin would be free of their centuries-long lie, and Thor and Loki would be free of the stigma that had made them need to hide away, and keep their affections under cover.

Frigga had gone to bed that night feeling reassured. They were making the best choice, for their kingdom, and for their sons.

She should have known better. The next morning, the Fates laughed at them, and continued laughing until the day Malekith ran her through with his blade.


End file.
